Yesterday morning I sat down to start writing an article, what usually happens is I just go to my Macbook and open it and on a good day inspiration happens and I empty out the contents of my brain, it's the best way to write I've found and I'm still pretty rubbish at writing even just a few posts in advance, I write best when I am inspired and happy or when I am sad and my heart hurts, I'm not sure why this is but I know that I have an ability to write page after page when I am experiencing times of great angst. Today is obviously not that day as it's now 24 hours later and I've sat with my blog page open trying to write for hours without saying a thing!
I think perhaps it sums up my general mood and slight malaise at the moment, I said in my last post that I'm in a transitional time, I am between peaks or troughs and I guess I'm just waiting for the next thing to happen.
Yesterday I had Reiki for the very first time, I am still coming to terms with what I experienced so please forgive me if my description isn't the most erudite paragraph I've ever written. Reiki is otherworldly, it connects you to things which are bigger than you, as I lay there with my eyes shut I felt the sensation of warmth and the sun on my face, I saw colours of red and orange and yellow, at one point I felt so emotional I thought I was about to cry, but then I felt myself smiling at other points, I experienced tingling, nausea, temporary dull pain and a force in my chest, my solar plexus where I usually feel my anxiousness in and I knew that was the anxiety and all of the negative feelings within me were trying to leave, had they left and I'd felt the power of the release I am sure I might have collapsed with relief but I'm so naturally uptight that it's going to take more than 1 session for that to happen, I have no doubt that sooner or later it will though.
I saw before me the things I want in my life, love, companionship, travel, to share experiences with you, the world, I want to take you on journeys as you sit at home or at work reading my words, I want you to feel and grow with me, I want you to feel like you are never alone as long as you are reading my blog and coming on adventures with me every day for it is the thought that you are there which powers me to keep on writing.
I also saw the need to let go, that I am holding onto things which are holding me back, the life I lived which made me who I am today, some of that is still toxic to my own universe, I need to move on, I need to not feel the pain anymore, I need that great release and I know that it is coming. Susan my reiki master guided me on a journey today without even saying a word, I felt her presence as we shared an experience which was wholly spiritual and healing, there is a power out there as Susan described, it's whatever you want to call it, God, an energy, a vibration and when we are attuned we feel it so perfectly that we vibrate at the right frequency and we are healed and energised.
I have to wait for around a week now, just to see what happens, for just a little while, maybe even just periods of seconds I felt completely aligned with life, the universe and everything and so I must wait to see what comes back, Susan advised that I need to be within nature because when I am surrounded by nature I heal, anyone who knows me well knows that this is definitely the case, when I am outdoors surrounded by the beauty of nature in all it's forms I feel at my happiest, when I have sunshine on my face I have joy in my heart and even more so when I have a friend or even Holly Bobbins besides me.
Magical, wonderful things are about to happen this week, they will drive me, inspire me, they will push me on to the next great phase in my life, I know it, it's just being patient and waiting for them to happen that is the hard part.
I received a complimentary Reiki session from Susan at the Cloud 9 Wellbeing in Cullercoats, it was a gesture of hope and kindness and love and faith but I promised non the less than I would write about it and let you know just how amazing it was, at the moment they have an offer of 3 Reiki Sessions for £100 and you get a Himalayan salt lamp as big treat for saying thank you, you know what I'm on a mission to make some income for this week!