The end of another week beckons and it's my last weekend at work, I get a whole weekend off next week, it might just be because it's Christmas though!  So many brilliant things are happening in my life currently, not all due to the magic of Christmas but I like to think there's an extra sparkle in my step because of it.

So, it's Thursday evening (just about) and I'm pretty tired after 3 events over the last 3 nights, I only have to remind myself that I used to hide away from the world to know just how very far I've come. Even this year I can see a definite transition as I've transformed into, well me, the real me, the me that was hiding inside, I don't want to be narcissistic and say like a butterfly from a cocoon because really, I'm over 40 and I'm far from being a butterfly, maybe I'll settle for a moth, moths are nice too, in their own way and that's me, I'm nice, in my own way.

I have spent too many years feeling not good enough, I've hated the days I feel fat and the days I've felt ugly and the times I've made an effort and had it knocked down by other people were even worse, I am healed well enough now to not completely hate myself every time I look in the mirror and that's important, it was only in September that I actually bought myself a full-length mirror for the first time, mostly I hide it behind a door but I do occasionally look! 

I saw my doctor this afternoon, I have HRT patches now instead of the pills which are surprisingly inconsistent in the hormones they deliver, I am slightly worried about them falling off my bottom in public, "Ooh, what's that you've dropped something" "Oh don't worry, it's just my HRT patch, it must have fallen off my bottom" Anyway, I digress, we talked about the fact that I'd halved my bipolar meds around 7 or 8 months ago now and she's just so happy with my progress as am I, we agreed that I'd probably always need the half dose but that also I'm better than I've ever been and that's testament to the way my life is now, I am a great advocate of self-care and having a great support network around you, I have the best friends online and in real life and I'll never stop being thankful for them.

Now I'm never going to be the biggest fan of photos,  as soon as someone points a camera at me I instantly tense up, so much so that my face is often contorted like a wicked old witch or I look like a woman who's just escaped from a secure facility, and of course there's the blinking thing, yes I am a blinker, you have to take approximately 2867 frames of me to get one where I haven't got one or both eyes shut.  I'm also just better behind the lens than in front of it but I love this photo Harriet took of me, yes it's been edited in the same way I edit all of my images, because if you are going to have photos then they should be the best photos but mostly it's me as I am now, happy, thriving, enjoying life.

Earlier in the week I saw my wonderful psychic friend Susan, she said "You look so great, you are glowing and beaming" I know she could sense the energy I have inside and yes Mr France definitely has something to do with that because I feel alive again, it reminds me of my favourite Roald Dahl quote "If you have good thoughts they will shine out of your face and you will always look lovely"

So know this, right here, right now, this is me, not as I was then but as I am now, I am sometimes flaky, I have flashes of creative genius, I am extraordinary and absurd all in the same sentence, I am funny and sometimes cranky, I can get cross and then turn it into laughter in less than 30 seconds, most of all, though,  I love life and I love people and animals.  I love doing good deeds and I love making people smile, I am an idealist, I am completely left leaning and super liberal, I believe in truth, freedom, beauty and love and I truly believe that no one should ever be lonely.

I hope you'll stay around for the next chapter of my adventures because I think, and more so, I feel it in my heart that they might just be the best I've ever had.

10 reasons to love January...

January, first month of the year and for me it's a month which I'll be honest, isn't my favourite month of the year. I don't mind if it snows, in fact I quite enjoy a snowy ramble with Holly Bobbins but you can keep your dark, wet, dank and damp and give me some sunshine in return.

Now there are reasons you might love January so I've compiled you a little list - 

1. You got engaged and you're planning your wedding, believe me I would love January too, well if you've happened upon my blog because you're looking for quirky places to get married in the North East of England or you're just looking for a wedding photographer in Newcastle you should probably read my post about my favourite Doctor Who themed wedding I shot last year and you should also contact me especially if you are just planning a smaller wedding.  I don't shoot a lot of weddings now but I'm looking to take on about 4 more this year so get in touch before everyone else does.
2. A lot of what I do now entails being commissioned to write about and photograph holidays, travel destinations and dog friendly places to stay so January is always a good month to start planning adventures even if it's a little while before you can actually escape, I'm always looking for new commissions so if you have a particular hotel, guest house or interesting holiday you would like me to review, photograph and write about do get in touch, I take on commissions from publications as well as the actual holiday providers themselves.
3. January is the best month of the year to have friends around for dinner and I've just heard today that if you (like me) have seasonally affective disorder then you'll find that hugs are a great help and can even work better than a SAD Lamp, although I'll be honest I've just got one of those too, I am determined to defeat it this year even though I don't think it's ever got light this week, even Holly Bobbins seems to think it's perpetually nap time (I know how she feels, I might just hibernate).
4. Speaking of hibernation, really if you are going to do that then doesn't January just have to be the best month of the year for duvet days? I'm thinking cosy bed socks, duvet or knitted blankets on the sofa and a pile of your favourite heartwarming movies.
5. January has to be the best time of year to visit a cosy coffee shop, particularly if it's dog friendly, then you can say you've taken your pet for a walk and warm up with hot chocolate and a slice of your favourite cake, I'm quite spoiled living in Heaton as we have Teasy Does It, Heaton Perk, BLK Coffee and Heaton Ingredient which are all dog friendly, Holly Bobbins is a big fan of them all.
6. Find your word for the year, every year I have a theme for the year and this year it's Adventure, it's been a long time coming and I plan to have as many as possible, I'm not entirely sure where they'll all take me or what they'll involve but for me 2016 is most definitely the year of adventure.
7. I've been thinking for a while that I really have a lot of things I want to do in my home, a grand decoration plan that might just happen, especially because I have lovely helpful friends, I'm planning total redecoration although it'll be on a budget but I really want to have a home I can entertain in as well as just feel excited to be in, after all it's nice to have somewhere amazing to come home to in between my travels and adventures, I think I need to start getting to grips with Pinterest!
8. If ever there was a month for getting the photos of your computers and cameras and printing them and putting them on your walls it has to be January.  I have a ton of photos I haven't printed yet and I'd love to get as many as I can into photo books and frames and onto canvases, it's a quick and easy way to brighten up any room and my own picture wall is ready for a makeover.
9. They say that January is the best month of the year for starting diets and exercise plans, well I'm not a fan of dieting but I do try to live by the Slimming World plan, it's been a Godsend to me and I've lost over 3 stones in weight, I also try to get out most days and do 10K steps, if you can do this in January you'll find you can do 15K easily by April.  I'm happy to say that I've been at my target weight now for over 6 months.
10. Box sets, box sets, box sets, if ever there were a time to catch up on all of the amazing TV you've missed whilst you were out being social in autumn it's got to be January, I can recommend Jessica Jones on Netflix if you need a suggestion.

Whatever you do this January, don't be beaten by the grumps, lets all just plan to make 2016 the best most fun filled year ever!