Newcastle Photographer and Content Creator, Mandy Charlton, Always on a quest for adventure, often seen on buses, trains and planes. On a quest to be happier and healthier. Lives in Newcastle with her 3 cats, Iris, Maggie and Arthur. Loves good vibes, musicals and cakes. Full time professional wedding photographer in the north east of england alongside content creator on Tiktok, Instagram and Facebook

Thursday, January 15, 2015

Wearing your heart on your sleeve and why social media is a lie

The problem with wearing your heart on your sleeve dear reader is quite often it opens you up to being hurt but it does have the bonus that people always know what to expect from you, there's no real hidden side to me, I am on my blog as I am on social media as I am in real life.  I hate that thing when you meet someone you've spoken to on social media and they're not anything like the person you thought they were.  It's happened to me a couple of times and I've always been taken quite aback by it, those people were obviously far clever than I to be able to create a wholly different online persona.

The thing is though, and I was reading about this recently, is that social media and more importantly Facebook is a lie.  How many of us actually say how we're feeling on social media and how many of us only put the stuff out there that we want other people to see?

I read these kinds of statuses "life is totally amazeballs, I love everything" and I think back to the days when I myself used to write similar and it wasn't that they were an untruth but there's definitely something about putting those statements out there and the reasons we do it.  When you think about it, lets for example take holiday photographs, you know the ones, you're at your desk and it's noon on a Wednesday in August and Polly Perfectlife posts a photo of a giant cocktail she's having on her uber hot beach holiday, is she putting it out there because she needs to remind herself that her life is perfect or is she putting it out there to make other people say "oh look at her amazeballs life, I'm so jealous"  Conversely how many people do we mute or remove when all they do is moan and complain about the bad things in life?  I'm guilty of it myself, I simply won't tolerate rain cloud people even though I myself am going through a period in my life where not much fun stuff actually occurs. 

Something else I was reading about yesterday is concealed depression, something which I'd like to come out and hold my hand up and say that most of the time that's actually me at the moment, I think I've been pretty depressed since I lost my one true love but you can't go on about it endlessly can you?  It's not helpful to anyone if you just post "so bloody depressed" on every single Facebook status and it's going to get you muted/unfriended/hidden from newsfeed so it's just easier if we all post only the good things about our lives or if there isn't anything good it's just better that we post nothing, well no, that isn't ok actually because I think social media can lead to us concealing depression even more so and I actually think depression is something we should be talking about a lot more often, we should be normalising it because so many people have to go through it and still far too many people are suffering in silence.

I'm not sure how much if any of this blog post will make any sense at all but I think one of my goals for this year is to go out into real life situations and see friends, make more friends, do things which aren't all about social media because as I noted yesterday I've just reached the point of having 5000 followers on Twitter, I spend far too much time on social media when in my actual real life it can be days/weeks/months between seeing friends in real life.  I'll tell you what I would love to do, maybe I could invite all 5000+ of my Twitter followers to have a real life party, I wonder how many of them would actually turn out not to be robots eh?!

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