December is that time of year when we look back and reflect on all that's gone before and as I've been lying awake in the wee small hours (sleep and bipolar during December are always a challenge but one I've grown to accept and deal with) I've been thinking about all of the wonderful things that have happened this year.  

This glorious year, full of travel and friendship, a year when I've shot over 350 portrait sessions and around 15 weddings, a year when at times, it's been a challenge just to go on but thanks to a little stubbornness and my steely resolve I've not only managed but in most cases I've beaten all of the challenges I've faced, and I'm not going to lie, sometimes it's required friends to help me through the difficult times but a life with good friends is a life worth living.  Possibly one of the most trying things and something I'm still dealing with was the exit of 2 friends of more than 10 years, in the blink of an eye they cut out not only me but also Harriet from their lives completely, no explanation or argument or discussion or reasoning, we were all of a sudden just dead to them, I still don't understand but thankfully in therapy I'm working on it.

I don't want to dwell on the negative though as it's only one small part of what was otherwise my favourite year.

In 2017 I've visited Madrid,  Palma de Mallorca, Cannes, Nice, Monaco, Ventimiglia, Soller, the southwest coast of Scotland, Northumberland, Bluestone in Wales, and my favourite, Antibes, take me back to Antibes tomorrow, a jewel in the crown of the Cote d'Azur, so much sunshine and easy living.  Most of my overseas adventures were with Abigail this year with the exception of Madrid to where I flew with Harriet, my best friend, and soul-sister, with Harriet and her family I have found family and that's' something I'll be forever grateful for.

2017 will forever be the year I decided with Looby that we would home educate and what an adventure that's been, we've flown by the seat of our pants, and every day is different, some of our learning is so relaxed it's actually happening by osmosis but I don't regret it for a single moment, even on the hard days when I'm faced with a teen who refuses to speak and will only grunt in the way that monosyllabic teens do.

Work this year has been crazy and there were times when it completely enveloped and overwhelmed me but I continue to thrive in business and as we go into 2018 I want to keep building on that, I launched Photography for Life a couple of weeks ago and as yet, people are still scared of this brand new shiny way to look at the way we do photography, by this time next year I will have at least 100 subscribers, It's going to take a lot of hard work but to that I am not adverse.

Christmas this year is a marvellous thing, I've finally got our whole house looking magical, even the bathroom has festive rubber ducks and we must have at least 20 different sets of lights in our rooms.  I also think from a health point of view that 2017 will be remembered as the year I finally conquered Seasonally Affective Disorder, I'm taking 10,000iu of Vitamin D a week, 2 magnesium tablets a day and when I get up in the mornings I spend a couple of hours sitting in front of my SAD lamp, in the last couple of weeks I've seen my energy levels soar and I've accomplished so much, I actually feel like a new woman and along with the CBT therapy I'm having for anxiety and to deal with old wounds I think I might be a whole new woman in 2018.

In 2017, I went on 1 date, had no relationships and I think it might be a sign from the universe that I am pretty undateable but I don't think I mind anymore, I am happy to be single, I am happy not to have to make the compromises that relationships take.  It is of course because I only go out if it's for work or home ed things so my own fault because I'm not putting myself out there but one of my things I'm learning to deal with in therapy is the fact that I am terrified of men, once I've had CBT to retrain my brain I may feel differently, I may want to try dating again and if I do, I'll know it won't make me crazy.  I've also come to terms with the fact that I judge every man against Paul and whilst that happens there's no chance I'm ever likely to meet anyone, I thought I would stop loving him one day but I've dealt with the fact that no, I'll love him to my dying day and again, that's why it's best that I remain single and that's not a bad thing, at least I've had movie love, all-encompassing and at times  fullfilling to my very soul, some people aren't lucky enough to find that at all so I'm glad I did, even if it wasn't forever.

Looking ahead I've no idea what 2018 is going to give me, I know I'm going to Norway in the summer on a cruise when Abigail finishes her GCSE's and I'm sure there'll be an adventure or two with Looby as we continue our home ed journey and I think Harriet and I cherish best friends holiday every year to somewhere we've never both explored.  

It's my Christmas party tomorrow and I only have 4 days outdoors photographing small people and their families before a couple of weeks off, I've just about met my writing commitments for the year and so we are really relaxing now and doing fun things, baking, festooning, partying, reflecting and celebrating.

2017, you were a good year, a great year, 2018, I am coming to you get you.

Biggest Ever Christmas Gift Guide 2017

Not satisfied with bringing you my gift guide for foodies, mums and Christmas preparations I'm today bringing you my biggest ever Christmas gift guide. You'll find everything from food, stocking fillers, presents for mums, dads, teens and even a couple of things for your four-pawed best friends.  Let's not delay any further and head straight into my biggest ever Christmas gift guide for 2017.

Hofmeister is an essential Christmas party ingredient. Perfect for all lovers of premium lager, this wondrous golden lager recently won Best Lager at the World Beer Awards (I bet that was a fun night out) and you can get your mitts on a case or two for your Christmas celebrations, Hofmeister, this year's go-to Christmas lager.  Hofmeister is also available in gift packs to give that man (or woman) a special kind of treat this Christmas, available on Moonpig you'll find a fabulous Hofmeister 2 pack with glass or if you are feeling extra generous there's the Hofmeister 5 pack with glass. The perfect gift for friends and family who enjoy a quality, delicious lager.  

An essential for teens who like lovely nails but want a quick easy fix which won't wreck their real nails, this one step gel press on manicure from Kiss comes in an array of marvellous sparkly designs.  My girls might just have to stop me from pinching theirs, and you can purchase them here. A perfect stocking filler idea for teens. 

It's no secret that I love candles and I'm forever using so many matches. I have the answer though, this year for those candle lovers this stylish multipurpose zippo lighter is definitely a way to make sure your house is twinkling with candles, lit with the most stylish candle lighter I've ever seen. If you're giving candles as gifts this year, why not add this lighter in and create a mini candle hamper? 

Speaking of hampers, if your foodie friends are anything like me they'll adore a Hamper from Lunya this Christmas. Lunya offers the biggest selection of Catalan and Spanish food anywhere in the UK and if you are lucky enough to live in either Liverpool or Manchester you can visit their Deli, Bar and Restaurant. I just hope they'll open their next branch in Newcastle. Now go buy a hamper and whilst you are there, I'll have the Boqueria hamper! 

I love travel and I'm a bit of a geek, so what do you get when you put the two things together?The Geeks Guide to Britain of Course. Inside you'll find places of invention, creation and technological wonder all over our cherished isle. Perfect days ideas out for the geeks amongst us and they're sure to fascinate the kids too. This would make a great gift for a friend or stocking filler. 

Hunter Wellies are synonymous with style and fashion as much as they are with being outdoors in the coldest month of the year. Wear them on your tootsies and cut a dash whilst walking the dog or going to a fashionable event. You'll find these yellow wonders on one of my favourite outdoor websites, Tiso, Scotland's original outdoor store, and would make a lovely gift for someone special. 

If you are looking for a talking point as well as a stocking filler, do check out these Jelly Beans Mixed Emotions. Who knew that sibling rivalry had a flavour or new puppy? We've had many hilarious conversations and let me just say now, anger tastes of cinnamon! Something fun for everyone while they're opening presents on Christmas morning. 

You just have to look at my desk to know that Lonely Planet publications are my very favourite. I have more books than I've been to countries and I'm constantly planning my next adventure, so it feels only right that I should spread a little Christmas cheer by gifting Lonely Planet 2018 diaries around in the hopes of inspiring my fellow travel junkies to take an extra trip or two away next year. Maybe if I'm very lucky they'll plan one with me! Perfect for friends who are just starting to travel or seasoned travelers. 

A good hairbrush is essential for good hair. Our hair is so precious, don't we owe it a decent brush to tame our manes in the mornings? Rock and Ruddle produce glorious brushes of the highest quality, so put one in your teen's Christmas stocking this festive season and say hello to wonderful hair.

When thinking about our four-pawed best friends this Christmas you kind of owe it to them to bathe them in the best product. I have to declare that Doctor Bronners 18 in 1 hemp pure castille soap is not only perfect for Holly Bobbins, it's also amazing for humans and not only that, I mean this stuff is crazy good, you can use it for everything from washing your face right through to cleaning your make-up brushes and even drains, I don't think there's anything else out there like this. A wonderful and useful gift for dog or cat owners or beauty enthusiasts alike. 

The RCA 2 in 1 Saturn Pro 10.1 inch android tablet is perfect for those pesky teens who need to be constantly connected at all times. I gave this to Looby to test for just a few days to get the teenage low down and she loved it. It has a detachable keyboard with trackpad and she found she could do everything she needed to whether it was checking on her latest Insta or watching her favourite Youtubers. If you have a teen who wants a tablet, we'd both recommend this, and this one, well it's become apparent that dad needs a new tablet and so the girls are gifting him one of these.

Christmas just wouldn't be Christmas without a tub of Haribo. The best thing is they also do a range of Veggie sweets, this year it's Haribo giant trees, perfect to keep even the peskiest teenage daughter a very happy girl. Add a few packs of Haribo to kids' or teens' stockings for something sweet. 

As many people may know, Holly Bobbins is my favourite beagle in the whole wide world so when I found out that my favourites Biscuiteers also did tasty dog treats I was more than a little excited, that was before I found out they have a beagle on the tin. You can guess who's going to be a very happy beagle this Christmas. 

A little Christmas stocking filler you'll be thrilled to find on Christmas morning, these dead sea soaps are essential for keeping you festively sparkling. The Dead Sea has for years been known for its amazing beauty secrets and now you can purchase some of those essential minerals so you'll be beautified and relaxed this Christmas.

Whilst on the subject of stocking fillers, wouldn't you like to find some Moroccan hair oil hanging from the branch of your Christmas tree on Christmas morning. It comes in formulas for blondes and another which any colour hair will benefit from, I know what I'm hoping to find in my Christmas stocking this year.

Christmas can leave you feeling a little battered and bruised so take some time out to relax when you find some Nelson's Arnicare in your Christmas stocking. Nip off to the bath whilst everyone is playing with their gifts and when you emerge, you'll be rested, relaxed and your muscles will thank you.

Impulse Body Sprays may well have been around since the days when I was a teen but now I can pass on some new Impulse smells to my own teens. Tropical beach with espresso anyone? These would be great in a stocking or as part of a homemade beauty hamper gift. 

For your photographer friends this Christmas, Bob Ryan wants to reprogramme your brain so that you become more successful and crucially, it's going to help you make your business more profitable. Check out The Master Photographer, this is not a book for beginners, but it would be perfect for professional photographers. 

If you are a home educator and looking to jazz up your home economics why not gift a sushi kit for 2 and then you can have your very own Japanese cookery lesson. You know the best thing about teaching kids to cook? They'll make you sushi!

We all crave for simpler times and this is definitely one of those products from yesteryear that will delight the kids and geeks of the now. Retro pocket games are all the rage as we remember the games we played with much nostalgia, it might just be me but I think somewhat the high tech now kind of games are filled with violence and often incredibly complicated so I'll be delighted to gift my geeky teen this at Christmas and you can too, they're available at findmeagift.co.uk

Oh Stollen, you old firm Christmas favourite, I love to eat you and gift you but wait, what happens if the person you want to gift to is gluten-free? Well, worry no more because Elizabeth D Bakes does a gluten free stollen everyone can enjoy!

I'm already readying myself for Looby skateboarding past me as she goes from the front door to the back gate on this Enuff Skateboard on Christmas Day and if you have teens who have asked for any kind of wheeled thing this Christmas you would be advised to head over to Skates, just don't forget the protective headgear!

Star Wars fan in the house? I love this Stormtrooper Bluetooth speaker, it's cute, quirky and handy for connecting at any given point to your mobile phone or computer, just remember to play the main theme to Star Wars loudly when it first arrives! A great gift for Star Wars fans. 

This may well not have made it into anyone's Christmas gift because I've been using it for weeks and the Harley Street Skincare 24-7 set is simply amazing. I love the serum, I adore the anytime moisturiser with spf20 and when I used the exfoliating cleaners my skin was sparkly after removing all of the dead skin cells. I am a total convert to this stuff. Why not treat the one you love this Christmas or simply treat yourself instead.

It's almost painful to admit but I'll be 44 in February so I definitely need all the help I can get. Vogue actually recommends Anew Reversalist night treatment cream from Avon and if it's good enough for Vogue, it's good enough for me to gift to my friends who are of a certain age.

Christmas and Port go together like Turkey and Cranberry, or in my case a good cheeseboard would not be the same without a glass of port and there's none better than Grahams Tawny port which has been aged for 20 years. You can guess this didn't make it into anyone's stocking other than mine, but it would make a lovely gift for friends and family. 

I'm gifting this stuff to all of my hard working friends this Christmas, and I'm keeping the lip balm for myself. The lip balm's an essential especially if, like me, you have to work outdoors in all seasons. You can treat yourself to a gift pack this Christmas or pop them in a loved one's stocking, make sure you check out the full range of O'Keefes this Christmas.

Fancy giving yourself a natural little boost this Christmas? Vivid Matcha is a concentrated form of green tea, you can have it in shots or sprinkle it on ice-cream, and it also comes in satchets for a potent brew. This would be great in a hamper this Christmas or as a stocking filler. 

Fancy popping some cute little gingerbread houses on your mugs of festive hot chocolate this Christmas? Well search no more because I've found the perfect product, this mini house cutter from Ruby Lou's treats will produce the perfect little gingerbread houses which hang on your mug.

If you have a giant iPhone like me then you need both of the above products from Tech 21. The impact shield self-healing screen protector along with the funky and gorgeous phone case will make your phone not only safe to carry around even if you are accident prone like me and it'll also make your phone look devilishly fashionably attractive too! If you have any tech lovers in the family this would make a great gift, as it would for any accident-prone teen too. 

Finding gifts for Iain is always the hardest thing, what do you purchase for a 21-year-old who has Aspergers, doesn't do Christmas and has just started an apprenticeship in IT? Well this year I have found at least one thing he loves, this Star Wars Sheaffer pen set. It's stylish, great for geeks and I won't have to worry about him losing his pen anytime soon! The perfect gift for any Star Wars fan. 

And finally, we're back to my beloved beagle. Hemp by Hownd skin, nose and paw balm is essential for making sure her little paws are cared for. Containing hemp it means I can use it for all kinds of things and after a long walk, I'm sure she'll love a little of this massaged into her paws, she does love Doga does Holly Bobbins. It also contains sun protection to make sure that she doesn't get burnt in the sunshine.

I want to personally thank all of the companies who've helped compile this year's bumper Christmas gift guide, I could not have done this without them and whilst this article may contain affiliate links and products gifted to me, I haven't featured anything I wouldn't personally recommend.

If you loved this gift guide you might also like my gift guide for foodies or gift guide for mums. 

10 ways to survive Christmas

Christmas may be my favourite time of year but it's also stressful, busy, full of anxiety and my bipolar doesn't react well to it meaning a lot less sleep and me constantly being a little too high followed by an enormous slump afterwards where I start sleeping for 14 hours a day and don't want to leave the house.

In general over the years though I have become much better at self-care and I've come up with my own list of survival tips for the whole festive season. You know, most of us are struggling with one thing or another, whether that be a mental health issue or being self employed or single parenting, and it's easier to think that everyone else is having a way better time that you. Maybe they are, or maybe they're just posting selective tidbits on social media whilst they're secretly fed up or dying inside.

I don't know if this list is exhaustive but it's my attempt to glide through the season without falling off my proverbial ice-skates. Without further ado, here's 10 ways to survive Christmas.

1. Remember that Christmas isn't just one day

We often get wrapped up thinking that Christmas is all about those 24 hours on the 25th of December and because we're so focused on that we miss out on enjoying the build up and Twixtmas afterwards. I used to be exactly like this and sometime between Christmas night and Boxing Day I would have the biggest come down, I'd be so depressed. If you can focus on making each day special you're less likely to have that Christmas night darkness which can overwhelm the rest of the season.

2. Enjoy the lull of Twixtmas

In case you didn't know, Twixtmas is the series of days betwixt Christmas Day and New Year's Eve. They're the days of lull and quiet and calm, enjoy reading books, eating cheese, drinking glasses of hot chocolate or mulled wine. Try to take time for yourself, don't rush to the sales, we should be using this time to renew, refresh, recover, lets kick real life into touch for as long as we possibly can. How about trying a week of minimal spending too, and enjoying the things and people you have in your life without dashing out and buying more.

3. Don't Overdo It! 

I can't stress this highly enough. A large proportion of the population will get the Boxing Day cold because they've drank for the whole of Christmas Day, suppressing their immune system and no wonder Boxing Day is a miserable existence. I've never been one for alcohol, I'm mostly allergic to it, sulphite free alcohol should stop the hangovers at least but also remember that alcohol is a depressant and if you have any kind of mental health issue, it's probably not a good idea to spend Christmas Day caning it! If you're looking for a treat, try my list of Christmas preparation savers for some food and drink inspiration.

4. Try Not To Overspend

I'd like to hold my hand up and say, guilty, guilty and more guilty. I do it mostly every year and being self employed I tend not to work for around three weeks over Christmas and it's really late February/early March by the time my income bounces back.  This year I have things in place to make sure this doesn't happen. Do you know I don't keep any money in my current account now?  I keep it all in my savings account and it helps me to spend less as I have to think about each transfer I make.  I've also set budgets of £150 spend for each of my children, it's plenty enough for a pile of presents they want and they already get spoiled by their grandparents. They won't miss my extraneous pile of crap I usually purchase at the last minute in guilt because I feel I'm not a good enough parent. If you're looking for any gift inspiration, try my biggest ever Christmas gift guide.

5. Take time for yourself every day

A few weeks ago when I was out on the hunt for products to go into my gift guides, a lovely lady got in touch about Olverum, a bath oil which actually helps with anxiety. She recommended I try it and said she'd used it for the same purpose, and you know what?  It actually works. It's not a cure all and I'm not likely to be cancelling CBT but I lie in the bath for 20 minutes and I can breathe. This stuff is Amazing with a capital A, so if you want the best, most relaxing bath, I urge you to give it a try or you could even purchase it as a gift for someone this Christmas.

6. Don't get stressed about things beyond your control

We all encounter difficulties at Christmas, whether it be a troublesome family member, breaking down in the snow or a delivery not reaching you in time for Christmas Day. These are all things which you can't control and by working yourself into a mad frenzy you are just going to make yourself feel worse. Even if you have made some foolish mistake, just remember, when doctors make mistakes they kill people, the chances are you haven't done anything which is going to lead to someone's death. Sometimes surviving Christmas is about remembering that there are events outside your control and celebrating the imperfect.

7. Don't worry about not feeling festive

Now I could never be accused of this but for some people, for very many reasons, they don't want to celebrate or they just don't feel festive at all and that's okay. You can spend the Christmas holidays however you want to and if that means watching a Harry Potter box set, then do it, no one is going to judge you.

8. Don't be alone and lonely

There's a huge problem in our country with people feeling lonely and alone at Christmas. Maybe they don't have family or they feel isolated, you know what, no one should be alone at Christmas and whilst I can't invite you all for dinner this year I will be home for most of the festive season and even on Christmas evening so please, it's open house and I promise to help you feel festive and cheery.

9. Remember to breathe

Well this seems obvious right?  The issue is that if you have anxiety it affects the way you breathe, it then gives you pains in your shoulders, neck and head because you're so tense and there's no oxygen flow. I have a simple exercise for this. I lie on my bed with my head hanging off it and then I breathe in for 4, hold for 7 and exhale for 8, just five minutes can make such a big difference. Just remember not to get up too quickly or you'll be dizzy and fall over. Relax, breathe, and be one step closer to surviving Christmas and having the holiday you want.

10. You don't have to do everything

Christmas will still happen if you don't go to every party, if you don't prepare a dinner for 32 people. Sometimes it's okay to say no to invites and if friends are coming to your annual Christmas party it's okay to ask them to bring something or to help with the dishes.

I really hope these tips help just a little. The last couple of years I've actually had brilliant Christmases but every year there's a new challenge. This year, Abigail isn't coming for Christmas so we're having our Christmas on Boxing Day and for the first time I'm going out for Christmas Dinner. It's certainly going to be a Christmas like never before and you know what, I'm going to embrace that and you should too.