This is a collaborative post

Without a doubt 2020 has been a challenge so far and with the longer nights encroaching I'm here to tell you how to embrace the cosy life and escape the winter blues.  I've had the seasonal affective disorder for many years and built up all kinds of coping strategies so I know what I'm talking about and the past couple of years I've mostly managed to knock it on the head by living the cosy life so here are my top tips.

The basics

There are some basic proven things that can work and I wanted to start with them.  Taking a vitamin D3 supplement really can help, I'm under the care of an endocrinologist who told me that the biggest vitamin we lack in the UK is vitamin D3 because we just don't get enough oily fish or indeed sunlight so taking this as a supplement during the dark winter months really can help.

Buying a lightbox and sitting in front of it for 20 minutes a day can also help if you can't get outdoors into the winter sunshine, there are all kinds of lightboxes available which range in price, you just have to find one you like, you can even switch your light bulbs to daylight bulbs which can help brighten up the living space although that in itself might not be enough so just bear that in mind.

Live the cosy life

The most powerful tool I've learnt is to live the cosy life, dedicate the darker months to fairy lights, furry throws, comfortable furnishings and cosy pyjamas, candles which remind you of happy times or the rich scents of baked apple, cinnamon, pumpkin spice, all of these things give you a life which is more hygge and less horrible. Simple things like changing your surroundings with things like Parquet flooring can make for a much cosier life.

Connection with the earth

One of the best mindfulness tools is to reconnect with the planet, it's also called grounding, basically, we have moved away from our connection with the earth and so being barefoot on real wood flooring is one way of reconnecting ourselves, I know it might sound a little woo but honestly, the carpets many of us have in our houses do not help us to ground and it's one of the reasons I have real wood flooring all through my home and why I like to be barefoot as often as I possibly can.  If you can get outdoors and it's not too cold, try walking barefoot on fresh grass, or the ground or sand and breathe deep, honestly, I promise this stuff helps.

Celebrate the seasons

Christmas is coming and it's going to be different this year so I don't think building up to "One special day" is going to work and in fact, it might prove to be completely counterintuitive so instead, I would encourage you to celebrate the seasons, embrace them for all they are worth and see the Christmas period as a wholly wonderful thing on its own.

The end of 2020 might well be a challenge and especially if like me, you live on your own so be good to yourself, treat yourself kindly and surround yourself with the people or animals who you do have near you, I know that Holly Bobbins and the cats are a great source of entertainment so they'll be good company and when it does come to festive decoration, well you can be sure this year I'm going big, even if it is only for myself because twinkly lights and a glowing Christmas tree are most certainly a tonic which can make everything better.

Staying happy in an unhappy world

It's hard staying happy in an unhappy world and the world we're in right now really isn't all that happy.  There are 94 days left of this year and I spoke about this on my Instagram over the weekend, it could be the saddest and most challenging 3 months of our lives, Coronavirus, climate change, Donald Trump, Boris and his conservative cronies, Brexit, my daughter being at Uni, only in Durham but not allowed to see me because she's in a new household, not seeing friends or even Looby nearly enough...

I could go on, it's just not a happy time but I don't think being unhappy is good for my psyche, it's bad enough that SAD is coming and this year due to hyperparathyroidism I can't take any vitamin D3, nor can I escape to a sunshiny place and let's not even start on the uncertainty of my photography business due to the restrictions.

Truly 2020 sucks and I cannot wait for 2021 but I have to stay happy, it's too easy a decline into bad mental health.

What is the answer?

What is the answer?  I'm not entirely sure but I know that in the last 3 months of the year good things do happen.  Let's start with the biggest thing to get excited about, Christmas!  Anyone who knows me or has followed me on social media anywhere in the last 15 years will know just how much I love Christmas, I am the Queen of Christmas and this year, I think we're going to have to go extra big on Christmas to deflect all of the collective sighs of the world.  

How to spend Christmas Day alone

At this point, it looks like I'm going to be totally alone on Christmas Day and I can't even have an open house, my support bubble all have their own families and the girls will be together with their paternal relatives, it feels like a tragedy but I'm thinking that TV will be wonderful, I can eat and drink what I want and to prepare for that I'm going to build myself a hamper of treats (like this one I just found at M&S) just for me with everything I love, maybe books, pamper stuff, chocolates, Gin (that's obvious), Champagne, maybe a new lovely throw to wrap myself in.  It's the best way I can think of to cope with the day and hopefully I will be able to see both of my daughters on Boxing Day when we'll pretend it's Christmas Day again.  Maybe we'll have the rule of 6 back by then and I'll be able to have friends over, I can hope...

Embrace Autumn

It's autumn in just a couple of weeks the full splendour of autumn will be present in all of our parks and woodlands, natures last show before it goes into it's long winter slumber and this year we need to embrace the outdoors as much as possible as it's when Coronavirus is at it's least powerful so think woodland walks, flasks of hot chocolate, toasting marshmallows, making smores, leaf kicking, wearing wooly jumpers in bright colours and more importantly just enjoying the family or friends we can actually be with, I had Sunday lunch with my support bubble yesterday and it was bliss, I'd been in semi-lockdown before shooting 3 weddings to make sure I was as healthy and risk free as possible so I hadn't seen them for 2 weeks, it felt like an age and it was just lush to be there, I think if we can appreciate the small things, we're giving our mental health the best chance to come out of this relatively unscathed.

The cosy season

The cosy season is the best season in my humble opinion, I live for twinkly lights and candles, surrounded by cosy throws and tartan blankets, even though I redecorated my home this year it's still all revolves around making your home a cosy nest to protect you from the world and now is the time to feel like you're enveloped in a safe nest.  You could (like me) try some new craft Gins or open a bottle of the good wine (never the cheap wine, wine should be savoured and drank slowly), grab some artisan nuts (stop, it, cheeky) and maybe some strong crumbly cheese or maybe a charcuterie board and pop on your favourite movie (Moulin Rouge until I die) or explore the latest box sets.  Read books, play board games, make conversation with those you're with (if you don't live alone like me, I just talk to the pets).  See this season as though you're in a bubble (many of us are) and embrace pumpkin spice everything.

I'm sure I'll have more thoughts and oodles of Christmassy content over the next few months so do look out for my Christmas Gift Guide, my Foodies Gift Guide and my "12 Gins of Christmas" article.  Though I don't have all of the answers for staving off the loneliness or just getting through this awful time, hopefully having some ideas and putting our heads together, we can at least attempt to get through this supporting each other, checking in on each other and dare I say it (I hate it) Zoom Christmas parties are back on the schedule.