Christmas days are magical days, especially when it snows prior to the big day, it really makes me feel so much more festive, I think watching the snow fall when you are cosy and warm and everywhere is twinkly and bright, it's my nirvana, couple that with cuddles from Holly Bobbins and a big cup of hot chocolate topped with squirty cream and marshmallows and it's the nearest thing I think I'll get to absolute perfection.

This year has been my favourite countdown to Christmas for as long as I can remember because Looby has been here and we've really been able to embrace the whole countdown from decorating our house together which took many days to building (or trying to build) an epic Gingerbread house from our friends at Biscuiteers.

Let me just say now that Looby and I shall not be entering into any professional competitions anytime soon, it took 3 people to secure the sides of the house so that the walls didn't fall in whilst the roof had to be held on for 5 minutes.  Some people are ace builders of Gingerbread houses, I can say now, I am not one of them but we did end up with lots of tasty sugary icing dowsed gingerbread and the house is actually standing this morning so I think we've achieved our goal.

Just as we were erecting our gingerbread structure another heavy snow shower happened, now I should just say that the rest of the country have had snow days for the last couple of days whilst we in Newcastle have had approximately 2 heavy showers so I was a little shocked when I saw Looby and her friend wheeling 2 major parts of a snowman up our path and we have a chubby short snowman now sitting outside of our door.

So that's been this weeks quotient of art covered and Looby is also working on a horse related project about stabling and looking after a horse which her dad set her and as I write this she's doing 2 hours of science with her tutor after a morning of maths with her tutor, she's exactly where she needs to be with her educational level and the best thing for me to see is just how keen she is to learn just because no one is telling her that she has to.  I think the best and biggest difference about home ed to traditional education is that we are constantly learning, "school" never stops, she'll be writing a blog post at 10 in the evening or we'll be off doing grocery shopping in the mornings where she'll have a shopping list or where she'll work out what we need to purchase for recipes and then we cook together though I must admit, she's not the biggest fan of cooking or of cookery programmes but I feel she'll have enough skills to look after herself when she eventually does leave home one day.

Home education isn't a cheap fix, it requires time, patience and the financial ability to be able to pay for tutors and activities but it's 100% worth it to see how happy she is.  There are some days where I want to teach her things which she doesn't want to know or she just isn't interested in and that can be frustrating but we spend very little time arguing and I have nothing but appreciation for the time we get to spend with each other.

In January we're meeting with the representative from the local education authority and hopefully they're going to give us their blessing that we are doing exactly the things we need to do but you know what?  I have no doubt that it will all be fine because what I have now, is a confident unicorn who is bright and shiny and happier than she ever was, with home education, Looby really has come into her own.

Now you are 14

Today is the day, I officially feel older than my years, today the realisation hits that my last child, my youngest baby is 14 years old, she's still so young and precious though, she still has a childlike wonder which no one has managed to steal or dull, I think everyone should view the world like Looby does, for Looby sees the good in everything, she genuinely wants to make the world better, I remember not long after he dad and I split up, it was nearing the season of shopping for Christmas presents and she asked if I was going to buy something for her dad, I asked, what did she think was appropriate?  "Oh, a mug, mammy" she said "You could just write "I'm sorry I messed up on it". She really did believe that would work, if only the world could be the way that Looby sees it.

Looby is my only child I was well enough to hold straight after birth, and the one I stayed in hospital longest with whilst my moods were studied and writing pads were scribbled on deciding what they should do to me, I'll always be grateful for that month though, because I really did bond with Looby, not even once did I feel postnatally depressed as I had with Iain or Abigail.

I've been thinking about Looby's childhood a lot recently, maybe because I have time now, because we have this precious time that mums and daughters don't usually get to experience, I'm incredibly privileged to be able to have a career which suits home educating, something else to be grateful for, I also know that whatever happens in this year, Looby will remember it for the rest of her life, it's both a blessing and a pressure point, I worry that I'll fail her and won't be able to make each moment count, make every second magical but then I realise that what I'm essentially doing is giving her time and space to become the person she really wants to be, time to discover herself, time to form an identity in a way that traditional schooling won't allow.

We have no uniforms other than occasional desires to wear unicorn wings whilst galloping around Sainsbury's, that's me, not her...

Looby is special and caring, she's hilariously funny, her concept and understanding of most things in life is somewhere between the surreal and the ridiculous but that is why we love her because there's no one else quite like her, she knows about Nihilism and Hygge and it may even be after our "Plan your own holiday" task that she's grasped that it's not a great idea to want to book accommodation which is 21.5 miles away from the nearest swimming baths if you really want to go swimming and mum doesn't drive.

In the last few weeks she's cooked and baked up a storm, she can follow recipes and she does try to adapt and add to recipes with, well I'd say with mixed results but she knows that even if it goes slightly (or disastrously) wrong, it's fine because she'l have learned something from the experience.  I love the way she's learning things now, I don't think she's ever likely to crave to be a quantum physicist but to be honest, it's a little overrated and there's no right answers, only theories and rarely absolutes with everything only proven until it can be disproven at a later date.

Looby has always wanted to be a farmer from the very first day she could tell us and she still wants to work in agriculture or with animals and she has a huge passion for horses and riding, I'm not entirely sure where this came from as I've never ridden a horse and I'm not sure her dad has either, he is the sporty one but I'm pleased that she has more ideas about what she wants to do with her life now than many of us have 20 years after being 14!

She is my bright, beautiful, unicorn and I hope she never changes.  Today we're celebrating with a picnic (probably indoor because of the rain we've awoken to) and some fabulous iced biscuits, it's the Biscuiteers 10th birthday, a special one indeed for them and so they're celebrating with Biscuiteers 10 iconic tins, when they offered to send a tin, it was Looby who chose the fashion tin and a great choice it was, who wouldn't love edible shoes or an outfit you can shove in your mouth after you've laid it out on the table planning which top should go with which bottom! 

Pre-Christmas Gift Guide

There's no use pretending that it's not happening, Christmas is about to happen in just under 7 weeks, I've already watched Love Actually, I've sampled sumptuous Christmas fayre and I've seen the unveiling of  the Fenwick Christmas Window so before I get onto writing those posts I wanted to get my very first Pre-Christmas Gift Guide live, these are the presents that make advent better, presents which make December sparkle, presents which don't have to be kept for the big day itself and do I have some goodies for you?!

So, first up is the most amazing tin of biscuits from my favourites, one of this years festive tins is the Biscuiteers Nutcracker, indulgently priced at £35 and to sum up, each biscuit is a piece of tasty iced art in itself, they taste of Christmas in a lightly spiced, gingery type way and as the icing melts on the tip of your tongue you know you've been treat to something absolutely unique and completely special, the only problem is that when you first release them from their charming tin you might think they are too pretty to eat!

One of my favourite traditions of advent is, of course, the advent calendar, I like traditional ones with pictures behind magical doors and Looby is always delighted when every year for the past few years I've bought her a different Phoenix Cards advent calendar, this year, my favourite is the Christmas bakery and tea shop advent calendar because it's just so cute and it's free-standing so if like me you don't have spare places to hang one on the wall this is the perfect advent calendar for you.  The Calendar is priced at £7.50 and if you're mad on recycling it's pretty enough to be used for a few years to come.

One thing I am really looking forward to is giving Looby this amazing Christmas Eve box, which came from local company Rock, Paper, Bears, I adore the delicate laser cutting and I just know it's going to delight Looby even as a teenager, I'm working on filling it with all manner of treats to make Looby's Christmas Eve the best one ever.  The Christmas Eve Box is priced at just £15 and also available are tree ornaments which are £3 and Santa's magic key which are a steal at £1.50 and they always come in handy when you don't have a chimney.

This is a collaborative post and the products contained within the gift guide were kindly donated in exchange for a mention, I love each and every one and yes, I've already eaten the biscuits!