Since I took some time away from the world and came back more refocused on my work and the future, I've had to make some decisions. Everything that has happened or that is happening is having a direct effect on my blog.
I can't give blogging up because it's just something that I do and though my reader numbers have dropped people still come to read and for that I am grateful.
The thing is though that I have nothing salacious or even vaguely interesting to write about currently, I literally start work when I get out of bed and do as much as I can barring taking Holly for her daily constitutional and popping out for occasional photo shoots, coupling that along with being the best mum I can be, my life is busy but to you the reader, completely boring.
I have had people asking why I'm not writing about dating anymore and it's because I'm not dating, I literally gave up, I'm not in the right place in my life because I am always single-mindedly focused on the things that I want to achieve and dating just isn't one of those things.
I did try hard but I think the last straw was talking to someone, getting along fine and then when he asked to take me on a date I couldn't find a gap for 2 weeks and for him that was too long, or there was another man who pretty much called me boring because I'm all about work and family. I don't have the energy to go and look for a long distance relationship unfortunately because really, that's perfection, someone where you can make a splendid effort to be together but ultimately one which doesn't overwhelm the rest of your life, selfish on my part I guess and maybe that's why the decision to stay single was any easy one.
I'm very fulfilled in my professional life, I love creating an income which has hope for the future, an income which promised fun and adventure for the girls and me, yes it would be nice to be able to share some of those adventures with someone special but really, a soulmate is one in a million and I don't have the time to find them.
I'm lucky to have friends, male and female, online and offline so I have pretty much everything I need, I have a massage chair too now so there's another thing I don't need a man for...
Blogging is the thing I have put the most work into for the smallest reward for over a year, I wanted it to lead to regular writing jobs and in small ways it has so I can't help but be grateful for that but in some ways I'm happy to be up to date with blogging commitments currently because there are very few companies I like to work with, they have to fit with me, with my brand and with my style and because of the way that I write that's not always possible. My blog is very much still a diary of my life and it always will be. It's the same with photography, I am very honest with potential clients in drilling down that I am not X, Y or Z, people come to me because after 10 years I am very good at what I do and I am also different to everyone else, I do my own thing and I'm happy to walk away if I don't think our collaboration is going to reward both parties equally and it has to be this way because when I give my whole heart to a project it's exhausting but also amazingly rewarding.
If you have stuck with me through thick and thin, through my dating disasters and my parenting successes and fails then thank you, thank you for always being there, I'm going to take it easy with blogging for a while now and just write when I feel compelled but please don't give up on me because you never know, maybe the best, is yet to come.