Photographer of Families, Small People and Delightful Places, Travel and Lifestyle Writer and Blogger, Lives in Newcastle, Loves the North, Often Accompanied By A Beagle Named Holly Bobbins

Wednesday, April 19, 2017

I am not dating so why did I just subscribe to Eharmony?


I am not dating so why did I just subscribe to Eharmony


I am not dating,
I am not dating,
I am not dating....

Okay so I had an offer I couldn't refuse and joined EHarmony, they claim to have the best success rates and for what I actually ended up paying I'm happy enough that if it doesn't work with my 3 months initial membership then I'm not going to cry about it.

Now, as I've already said, I'm at a place in my life where I'm just happy being me, I have a life I love and for me to give up my solitude it's really going to take someone amazing with a capital A!

The worrying thing is I no longer even really know what I'm looking for, I mean, beardy would help being that I kind of like bearded sorts, bohemian is a statutory requirement because otherwise, they're quickly going to find me quite odd, height isn't important, they should obviously be hilarious otherwise they'll never keep up with my quick witted responses to pretty much everything, not saying I can't be serious but I do deal with a lot of things with humour.

Obviously, they should be a little cultured, a bit of a geek, mainly high functioning and overall if they don't like Doctor Who, Sci-Fi and Musicals then what the heck are we going to talk about.

I do feel though that because I'm narrowing it down so much that although I'm likely to get a much lower hit rate the chances are that the matches I do get will be more likely to be successful.

Except that, I'm not looking, I am not dating and I am not going to put any serious amount of effort into looking, if someone should fall from the heavens by chance then that's a different matter of course.

I actually have no idea why I even filled in the profile although that was a while ago, maybe my inner consciousness is trying to tell me something, maybe it's all Freudian and it's coming from my dark brain that even I don't know about.

I just can't see how someone could actually enhance my life at present, I have friends, amazing teens, I'm financially comfortable, I have several jobs I adore.  Do you think this is genuinely my most ridiculous move yet?

I guess the best we can hope for is that I can regale you with some tales of the men I encounter, like my initial frustration that no matter how many men I hide more appear and no matter what I do I cannot deselect men over the age of 43 or under 34, I literally have 105 potential matches sitting there and you know what, not one of them is an actual match, they're all "well you could choose, we think he would be perfect even if he's just outside your requirements.." No, no, no, stop doing this, I don't want you to pick outside of my requirements or what's the point of putting my bloody requirements in the first place?  Is this like buying a TV when they show you the next model up just in case they can upsell you?  Well, that's all well and good but honestly, most of the "upsells" I wouldn't even last 5 minutes with.  Eharmony I think suffers from the same fate as Match Affinity, yes you're matched on personality but that's not going to work if you don't even stand a chance of liking their faces.  Yes it's me, we've spoken about this, I can't date someone I don't fancy!!  It's not my fault, it's a genetic thing!!
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